[personal profile] stunningflowermachines
So, sometime in August I was writing a recipe for shark soup. A really bold, strong-flavored shark soup.

One of the ingredients of the soup was "a shark so hungry that even the word 'shark' will eat nearby words when you are describing the shark." You can probably already see where this is going, can't you? Well there was a surprise twist -- I was living on planet Earth the whole time.

Anyway, the word 'shark' ate my whole recipe and I didn't bother to post it. I just deleted it. The next day I wrote up another recipe (a tasty recipe for cornbread and the only such recipe that doesn't even need any corn), and I discovered that the word 'shark' (which didn't even exist on that recipe) had eaten the whole post again. I also discovered that Rosebud is a sled.

After a few days of this, I opened another recipe journal elsewhere. No luck. The word 'shark' ate every entry. I switched to a new computer and a new service, but still the word 'shark' followed me. I turned state's evidence against the shark and got on a FBI witness relocation protection service, changing identities entirely, but no luck -- I just couldn't get away.

So I worked with some Con-Lang fans and constructed a new language, designed so that the language would be difficult for the word 'shark' to digest. We named it Sharlingok, for obvious reasons.

It took a few months, but I've been successful. This entry is translated from Sharlingok into English, and seems to be just fine. I expect that all future entries will be posted in a similar fashion. But I won't continue with a recipe journal, just to be safe, because who knows what kind of dangerous ingredients are out there. Also, the killer was calling from inside the building.
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May 2012

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